{"id":5435,"date":"2019-03-26T21:10:58","date_gmt":"2019-03-27T01:10:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.silvercentury.org\/?p=5435"},"modified":"2019-03-27T16:51:48","modified_gmt":"2019-03-27T20:51:48","slug":"family-caregivers-are-older-than-ever","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/78.142.243.82\/~silvercentury\/2019\/03\/family-caregivers-are-older-than-ever\/","title":{"rendered":"Family Caregivers Are Older Than Ever"},"content":{"rendered":"

Perhaps it was inevitable: with so many people living longer, more and more empty nesters are taking on the care of parents who are frail and ill. Journalist Judith Graham explores what that means for the younger generation in terms of their health, finances and plans for retirement. She wrote her article for Kaiser Health News<\/a>, and it was posted on KHN\u2019s website on August 23, 2018.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cThis won\u2019t go on for very long,\u201d Sharon Hall said to herself when she invited her elderly mother, who\u2019d suffered several small strokes, to live with her.<\/p>\n

That was five years ago, just before Hall turned 65 and found herself crossing into older age.<\/p>\n

In the intervening years, Hall\u2019s husband was diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia and forced to retire. Neither he nor Hall\u2019s mother, whose memory had deteriorated, could be left alone in the house. Hall had her hands full taking care of both of them, seven days a week.<\/p>\n

As life spans lengthen, adult children like Hall in their 60s and 70s are increasingly caring for frail, older parents\u2014something few people plan for.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we think of an adult child caring for a parent, what comes to mind is a woman in her late 40s or early 50s,\u201d said Lynn Friss Feinberg, senior strategic policy adviser for AARP\u2019s Public Policy Institute. \u201cBut it\u2019s now common for people 20 years older than that to be caring for a parent in their 90s or older.\u201d<\/p>\n

A new analysis<\/a> from the Center for Retirement Research at Boston College is the first to document how often this happens. It found that 10 percent of adults ages 60 to 69 whose parents are alive serve as caregivers, as do 12 percent of adults age 70 and older.<\/p>\n

I had plans for my retirement \u2026Instead, I don\u2019t take time off and leave my mother. A big thing I deal with is the loss of my freedom.<\/strong>
\n–Judy Last<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The analysis is based on data from 80,000 interviews (some people were interviewed multiple times) conducted from 1995 to 2010 for the Health and Retirement Study<\/a>. About 17 percent of adult children care for their parents at some point in their lives, and the likelihood of doing so rises with age, it reports.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s because parents who\u2019ve reached their 80s, 90s or higher are more likely to have chronic illnesses and related disabilities and to require assistance, said Alice Zulkarnain, co-author of the study.<\/p>\n

Problems Older Caregivers Face<\/strong><\/p>\n

The implications of later-life caregiving are considerable. Turning an elderly parent in bed, helping someone get into a car or waking up at night to provide assistance can be demanding on older bodies, which are more vulnerable and less able to recover from physical strain.<\/p>\n

Emotional distress can aggravate this vulnerability. \u201cIf older caregivers have health problems themselves and become mentally or emotionally stressed, they\u2019re at a higher risk of dying,\u201d said Richard Schulz, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh, citing a study he published<\/a> in the Journal of the American Medical Association<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Socially, older caregivers can be even more isolated than younger caregivers. \u201cIn your 60s and 70s, you may have recently retired and friends and family members are beginning to get sick or pass away,\u201d said Donna Benton, research associate professor of gerontology and director of the Family Caregiver Support Center<\/a> at the University of Southern California (USC).<\/p>\n

Caregiving at an older age can put hard-earned savings at risk with no possibility of replacing them by re-entering the workforce. Yvonne Kuo, a family care navigator at USC\u2019s caregiver support center, has been helping an 81-year-old woman caring for her 100-year-old mom with vascular dementia in this situation.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s no support from family, and she\u2019s used up her savings getting some paid help. It\u2019s very hard,\u201d Kuo said.<\/p>\n

Judy Last, 70, a mother of three adult children and grandmother of six youngsters, lives with her mother, Lillian, 93, in a mobile home park in Boise, ID. Last moved in three years ago, after her mother had a bout of double pneumonia, complicated by a difficult-to-treat bacterial infection that put her in the hospital for eight weeks.<\/p>\n

She cared for her parents for years. She didn\u2019t know how to ask for help and no one volunteered it, even when her husband was diagnosed with dementia.<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t know if it\u2019s going to be permanent at the time,\u201d said Last, whose father died of dementia in January 2016 after moving to a memory-care facility. \u201cMom had asked me several years before if I would be there when she needed help and I told her yes. But I didn\u2019t really understand what I was getting into.\u201d<\/p>\n

Feinberg said this isn\u2019t uncommon. \u201cPeople in their 90s with a disability can live for years with adequate support.\u201d<\/p>\n

Last doesn\u2019t find caregiving physically difficult even though she\u2019s had two hip replacements and struggles with arthritis and angina. Her mother has memory problems and chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, relies on oxygen, uses a walker, has lost most of her hearing and has poor eyesight.<\/p>\n

But things are hard, nonetheless. \u201cI had plans for my retirement: I imagined volunteering and being able to travel as much as my bank account would allow,\u201d Last said. \u201cInstead, I don\u2019t take time off and leave my mother. A big thing I deal with is the loss of my freedom.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hall, who\u2019s turning 70 in September and who lives in Cumming, GA, managed her mother\u2019s and husband\u2019s complex needs for years by establishing a strict routine. Monday and Friday they went to a dementia respite program from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. On other days, Hall cooked, shopped, did laundry, helped them with personal tasks, made sure they were well occupied, provided companionship and drove them to medical appointments, as necessary.<\/p>\n

\u201cI did not expect this kind of life,\u201d said Hall, who has had two knee replacements and a broken femur. \u201cIf someone had told me it would be years caring for my mother and your husband is going to get dementia, I would have said, \u2018No, just no.\u2019 But you do what you have to do.\u201d<\/p>\n

A few weeks after our conversation, Hall\u2019s mother entered hospice following a diagnosis of aspiration pneumonia and life-threatening swallowing difficulties. Hall said she has welcomed the help of hospice nurses and aides, who ask her at each visit, \u201cIs there anything else you need from us that would make it easier for you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Where Caregivers Find Support<\/strong><\/p>\n

Though older caregivers get scant attention, resources are available. Over the years, Hall has shared caregiving ups and downs at CareGiving.com\u2014a significant source of information and comfort. Across the country, local chapters of Area Agencies on Aging run caregiver support programs<\/a>, as do organizations such as the Caregiver Action Network<\/a>, the Family Caregiver Alliance<\/a>, the National Alliance for Caregiving<\/a> and Parenting Our Parents<\/a>, an outfit focused on adult children who become caregivers. A helpful list of resources is available here<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Sometimes, caring for a parent can be a decades-long endeavor. In Morehead City, NC, Elizabeth \u201cLark\u201d Fiore, 67, became the primary caregiver for her parents when they moved around the corner from her, in a mobile home park, in 1999.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy dad took me for a walk one day and asked if I could look after them as they got older and I said yes. I\u2019m the oldest child and the oldest assumes responsibility,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

For years her father\u2014a difficult man, by Fiore\u2019s account\u2014had heart problems; her mother had a nervous breakdown and a slow, extended recovery. \u201cThey wanted me to be in their lives and I wanted to do for them\u2014I\u2019m a Christian\u2014but it was killing me. My heart was in the right place but emotionally, I was a wreck,\u201d Fiore said.<\/p>\n

After her father\u2019s death from kidney cancer in 2010, her mother became even more needy, and Fiore found herself spending more time responding to calls for assistance\u2014often about suspected medical emergencies. \u201cMy mom had a way of acting as if something was horribly wrong and then it turned out it wasn\u2019t,\u201d she explained.<\/p>\n

Fiore\u2019s health isn\u2019t good: she says she has chronic fatigue syndrome and thyroid problems, among other issues. But she didn\u2019t know how to ask for help and no one volunteered it, even when her husband, Robert, was diagnosed six years ago with dementia. \u201cI always expected myself to handle everything,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

Finally, the stress became unbearable last year and Fiore\u2019s mother moved to a senior living community close to Fiore\u2019s 62-year-old sister, 400 miles away. Now, Fiore spends more time attending to her husband\u2019s needs and tries to support her sister as best she can.<\/p>\n

\u201cAt 90, my mom is healthy as a horse, and I\u2019m glad of that but it\u2019s been a long time caring for her,\u201d she said. \u201cI\u2019ve changed a lot as a result of caregiving: I\u2019m more loving, more aware of people who are suffering. I\u2019ve found out that I am willing to go the extra mile. But I have to admit what I feel is tired\u2014just tired.\u201d<\/p>\n

KHN\u2019s coverage of these topics is supported by John A. Hartford Foundation and Gordon and Betty Moore Foundation.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Perhaps it was inevitable: with so many people living longer, more and more empty nesters are taking on the care of parents who are frail and ill. Journalist Judith Graham explores what that means for the younger generation in terms…<\/span><\/p>\n

Read more Family Caregivers Are Older Than Ever<\/span> ›<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n

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